So 2 days after my internet got hooked up in my apartment it stopped working again. So once again I am at the mercy of friends to relay my group messages. I feel very lucky to have American friends here. It is incredible how much better it feels to laugh with people going through the same thing after a CHINA RAGE day like my last blog. I must tell the story much better in person. Bc on paper everyone said it made them cry which was no my intent!
Hanging out with American friends also helps you meet people. I had been in my apartment for 2 weeks and was almost convinced the rest of the rooms were abandoned. I never saw anyone in the hallways or with the doors open, understandable it’s hot as crap! Yet when 3 blondes are laughing all night long my neighbors came to introduce themselves. He was smoking a cigarette, which are seriously less than a $1 a pack here no wonder everyone smokes, outside my room and hear us. Then he went and got his roommate, who woke up my other neighbor who works for an American company to translate. Mind you this is 2 am Sunday morning and the woman is in her pajamas. Yet she didn’t seem upset at all. I will refer to my neighbors as He He and She bc they all repeated their names while I looked blankly then finally smiled and said ok. Everyone knows there is a 3 what rule and after you make someone repeat something 3 times the polite thing to do is pretend you heard them and smile and nod. Part 2 is of coarse never bringing it up again and pretending it never happened so I will never know there names and quickly need to learn the Chinese equivalent of, “Hey you!” My friend Eliza speaks Chinese very well so the woman that was suposta translate ends up ooohing and awing over Eliza’s Chinese, which everyone does when Eliza speaks Chinese bc its so unexpected. So now I am trying to talk to these 2 guys whose native language is Cantonese so they still struggle with the Mandarin dialect and Heidi speaks better than me but still not fluent. He tells us he is a bus driver but uses the hand gesture of in the gun-shape. So being a smart ass I say to Heidi he must be a cowboy and of course that’s the one English word he knows! “Oh, cowboy! John Wayne!” he mocks. We all laugh but I am mortified.
Then we learn his roommate is a DJ and wants to know if we want to go to the karaoke bar! YES! Except its 2 am and we tell them we have to go to church in a few hours. But I am super excited, no worries Peach I am in no way attracted to them and my first sentence was “hello, I have a boyfriend.” I had the woman translate for me and everything. The Karaoke places in China are a private room with just your party to sing with. What fun is that! I can’t sing to my 2 friends all night. They will hate me for being a mic hog! So now every time I talk to me friends they say how are your neighbors and when are we going out. Except I haven’t seen any neighbors since. I guess I have to hang out until 2 am with the doors open to see my neighbors ever. And at 120 degrees it’s not worth it. I will just wait until I have loud friends over.
So speaking of being mortified, I got a pedicure last weekend. It is surprisingly not much different than in the US. They still laugh at me and talk about me in Chinese with me sitting right there and look at my feet then go get gloves! So this place is in the middle of a mall meaning that the chairs are against the wall in the hallway by the elevator and everyone that comes up the escalator stares and says, “Wooooah!” One of the few English words that has say Chinese meaning. So this guy there spoke perfect English, or at least enough to fool us by his small talk. So if his story is correct he was a college student helping out at his sisters business until he went back to school and the 5 year old little boy crawling up his leg was not his son but his sister’s son, though he wouldn’t tell us which sister. When it came to pick out the nail polish we realize he didn’t know colors in English. We also saw the broken English when it was time to explain that yes the pedicure is 25 but the nail polish is another 10 and another 10 for the emery board or water tax or some other crap. But at the end of the day I got a manicure and pedicure for 60 Yuan which is less than $10 US. Another difference in China is that people smoke everywhere; banks, restaurants, police station, buses. So my friend asked if it was ok for her to smoke at the pedicure place in the mall and they got her a little plastic cup to ash in. Well the little boy didn’t like this at all and stood right in front of her giving us the evil eye. He finally started saying something in Chinese so we ask the guy what he said and he translates, “he doesn’t like you putting your cigarette in there, its only for the hands!” Smart little boy, I like it!
So like an idiot I only packed tennis shoes to visit my friend and so I wore them to the pedicure place. The lady won’t let me leave and had the man translate that the shoes would mess up my toes and I could buy some flip flops from him and they would give me my money back when I returned them. So he asked what size I wear and I knew this wasn’t gonna go well. I tell him 8 (size 42 in China terms) and he laughs and says, “no that bigger than my shoes!” so he goes and brings me these Barbie shoes and I know they are not going to work so I say no but he proceeds to make me try them on then laughs and points so his sisters can laugh too as I can’t even get my toes in them. So Heidi goes to off to buy me some man shower shoes across the street and I wait in the pedicure chair getting stared at by all of china as they paraid by. When she finally gets back there are now 3 new customers who all stand to look at the huge man shoes I have to wear (she got size 50 just to be on the safe side!). And they laugh as I shuffle away.
So at church on Sunday I met my stalker. He came up to me after church and said “I think I saw you and your friends at the theater bus stop late last night, 11:30 maybe 11:45.” And I said “yes, I learn near the theater and teach at Shekou School.” Which he had never heard of even though he lives right down the street from it. That seems odd to me that everyone just stares at me when I say the name of the school. That’s what written on the side of the building! I have even said it in pointing distance and people still look at me like I am crazy. So the guy gave me his business card, everyone in China has business cards on them at all times, and tells me I can call him if I get lost. Which is super nice bc his English is perfect. And to his credit I kinda stand out especially in my village where no one has ever seen foreigners and when I am with my loud American friends. So I ask him a few questions about the buses and then say goodbye as my friends pull me away. Later after lunch we are walking down the street and I see the guy running by me and he yells, “Christy, this bus!” as he chases after the bus. I am going to put him in the emergency only pile.
Hanging out with American friends also helps you meet people. I had been in my apartment for 2 weeks and was almost convinced the rest of the rooms were abandoned. I never saw anyone in the hallways or with the doors open, understandable it’s hot as crap! Yet when 3 blondes are laughing all night long my neighbors came to introduce themselves. He was smoking a cigarette, which are seriously less than a $1 a pack here no wonder everyone smokes, outside my room and hear us. Then he went and got his roommate, who woke up my other neighbor who works for an American company to translate. Mind you this is 2 am Sunday morning and the woman is in her pajamas. Yet she didn’t seem upset at all. I will refer to my neighbors as He He and She bc they all repeated their names while I looked blankly then finally smiled and said ok. Everyone knows there is a 3 what rule and after you make someone repeat something 3 times the polite thing to do is pretend you heard them and smile and nod. Part 2 is of coarse never bringing it up again and pretending it never happened so I will never know there names and quickly need to learn the Chinese equivalent of, “Hey you!” My friend Eliza speaks Chinese very well so the woman that was suposta translate ends up ooohing and awing over Eliza’s Chinese, which everyone does when Eliza speaks Chinese bc its so unexpected. So now I am trying to talk to these 2 guys whose native language is Cantonese so they still struggle with the Mandarin dialect and Heidi speaks better than me but still not fluent. He tells us he is a bus driver but uses the hand gesture of in the gun-shape. So being a smart ass I say to Heidi he must be a cowboy and of course that’s the one English word he knows! “Oh, cowboy! John Wayne!” he mocks. We all laugh but I am mortified.
Then we learn his roommate is a DJ and wants to know if we want to go to the karaoke bar! YES! Except its 2 am and we tell them we have to go to church in a few hours. But I am super excited, no worries Peach I am in no way attracted to them and my first sentence was “hello, I have a boyfriend.” I had the woman translate for me and everything. The Karaoke places in China are a private room with just your party to sing with. What fun is that! I can’t sing to my 2 friends all night. They will hate me for being a mic hog! So now every time I talk to me friends they say how are your neighbors and when are we going out. Except I haven’t seen any neighbors since. I guess I have to hang out until 2 am with the doors open to see my neighbors ever. And at 120 degrees it’s not worth it. I will just wait until I have loud friends over.
So speaking of being mortified, I got a pedicure last weekend. It is surprisingly not much different than in the US. They still laugh at me and talk about me in Chinese with me sitting right there and look at my feet then go get gloves! So this place is in the middle of a mall meaning that the chairs are against the wall in the hallway by the elevator and everyone that comes up the escalator stares and says, “Wooooah!” One of the few English words that has say Chinese meaning. So this guy there spoke perfect English, or at least enough to fool us by his small talk. So if his story is correct he was a college student helping out at his sisters business until he went back to school and the 5 year old little boy crawling up his leg was not his son but his sister’s son, though he wouldn’t tell us which sister. When it came to pick out the nail polish we realize he didn’t know colors in English. We also saw the broken English when it was time to explain that yes the pedicure is 25 but the nail polish is another 10 and another 10 for the emery board or water tax or some other crap. But at the end of the day I got a manicure and pedicure for 60 Yuan which is less than $10 US. Another difference in China is that people smoke everywhere; banks, restaurants, police station, buses. So my friend asked if it was ok for her to smoke at the pedicure place in the mall and they got her a little plastic cup to ash in. Well the little boy didn’t like this at all and stood right in front of her giving us the evil eye. He finally started saying something in Chinese so we ask the guy what he said and he translates, “he doesn’t like you putting your cigarette in there, its only for the hands!” Smart little boy, I like it!
So like an idiot I only packed tennis shoes to visit my friend and so I wore them to the pedicure place. The lady won’t let me leave and had the man translate that the shoes would mess up my toes and I could buy some flip flops from him and they would give me my money back when I returned them. So he asked what size I wear and I knew this wasn’t gonna go well. I tell him 8 (size 42 in China terms) and he laughs and says, “no that bigger than my shoes!” so he goes and brings me these Barbie shoes and I know they are not going to work so I say no but he proceeds to make me try them on then laughs and points so his sisters can laugh too as I can’t even get my toes in them. So Heidi goes to off to buy me some man shower shoes across the street and I wait in the pedicure chair getting stared at by all of china as they paraid by. When she finally gets back there are now 3 new customers who all stand to look at the huge man shoes I have to wear (she got size 50 just to be on the safe side!). And they laugh as I shuffle away.
So at church on Sunday I met my stalker. He came up to me after church and said “I think I saw you and your friends at the theater bus stop late last night, 11:30 maybe 11:45.” And I said “yes, I learn near the theater and teach at Shekou School.” Which he had never heard of even though he lives right down the street from it. That seems odd to me that everyone just stares at me when I say the name of the school. That’s what written on the side of the building! I have even said it in pointing distance and people still look at me like I am crazy. So the guy gave me his business card, everyone in China has business cards on them at all times, and tells me I can call him if I get lost. Which is super nice bc his English is perfect. And to his credit I kinda stand out especially in my village where no one has ever seen foreigners and when I am with my loud American friends. So I ask him a few questions about the buses and then say goodbye as my friends pull me away. Later after lunch we are walking down the street and I see the guy running by me and he yells, “Christy, this bus!” as he chases after the bus. I am going to put him in the emergency only pile.
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